Demo Perspective

Today was bitter sweet.  Firstly it was the first day back in the Kwoon since my work departure weeks ago.  It was a chance to see the blood sweat and tears that have went into the demo for Canada Day.

As always, when you have been part of something from the beginning, and have repeated it many times, it is difficult to step back and see the progress you are making. There are few advantages to being on the outside of an event like this one, but one thing it does afford me is a clear perspective on the product that has been developed in my absence..

Watching this demo I equated to the motivational boost of the black belt ceremony.  It was inspirational to see how far each person, and the team had come since I had left.  To everyone involved it was AWESOME!  It was affirmation to me why this group of people are the ones I choose to be around.  Watching the demo makes me proud and extremely honored that I can be a part of this.

This could not have come at a better time, as currently I have been struggling with the transition of being away.  To those of you at the Kwoon today that I had a chance to speak with, thank you for your words of kindness, motivation and support, they are much appreciated, as are your comments and blog postings which I have resorted to following regularly.

To everyone in the Demo on Monday, we will see you there. I can’t wait to experience it, and offer any support I can!  Good Luck!  

vincekrebs.blogspot.com

Who is captain of this sinking ship?

Good morning! There is a seven course breakfast awaiting you.  Your feet are cold?  Well here are some extra fuzzy slippers. You don’t need to go to work today. I have paid all the bills for the month.  Here is your fishing rod. Your chauffeur awaits in the limo outside to take you to any trout stream you wish.

I step out onto the porch but something is dreadfully wrong.  It’s dark out, and snowy and cold. BAAAAAAM! Frozen steel toe work boot kicks me in the backside and knocks me off of the slippery porch, bounce off the frozen oak tree and land in a patch of prickly rose bushes.  Yup, it’s June again and this is the transition I knew was coming.  No more face time in class, no chance of taking in practice and demo’s, no more meeting team mates to knock off a personal goal.   

So here I lie on my back, goose egg on my forehead, prickles stuck in my neck, snowy cold ground surprisingly comforting on my bruised backside.  How long do I lie here and sulk. If I stay too long I am likely to doze off and become a permanent popsicle.   

Once again chopped from the nurture of the Kwoon and the team. It is really easy to forget how to become self-sufficient.  I have been laying here in the cold snow for long enough, it’s time to change. 

vincekrebs.blogspot.com

Maintenance is not Mastery

I am one of the first people to say if you don’t like your circumstances, than change them.  Heaven knows I hear my share of complaining from unsatisfied people in their choice of career.  But after a short stint out to Saskatchewan, I am finding that commitments are causing an increasing unrest.  As the time jar is starting to fill with work commitments, other items are spilling out onto the table in disarray. 

The big concern is moving into “Maintenance Mode” as Sifu described.  At this point in time maintenance mode is not good enough.  I really feel like I have to be moving forward in my Kung Fu, I am just not sure of the approach to take. Missing on a board break this past demo was a harsh reinforcement that maintenance is not mastery.

vincekrebs.blogspot.com

On the road.

Well time is tight this week, I am currently out of town for work.  This could be the start to a long period of time away from training at the Kwoon.  What is important to me now is to fall back to the processes I know for keeping what is important front and center. Going back to my journals may be good.  Spring last year was full of stress trying to figure things out, fall was considerably better.  But really the main difference was my attitude. 

Eat properly, get sleep when I can, stay connected with journals.  That’s a start.

Hey Everybody, meet Newman!

He looked into my eyes, and I looked into his……eight eyes. He looked at my two skinny white legs and I looked at his…..eight strong hairy legs. He looked at my teeth designed mostly for chewing plant food, and I looked into his…..fangs designed to rip insect flesh.

Right now I am only here because my wife has forced me to drive to this pet store in order to hold a tarantula. Only one question goes through my mind….where did I go wrong in choosing a wife.

Holding a tarantula was a goal I set for myself in the I Ho Chuan after my oldest son (who loves all insects and spiders) held a very large tarantula with no fear whatsoever. This was no doubt going to be one of the greatest challenges I had ever faced.

I am Arachnophobic. Size certainly matters, but even very small ones REALLY bother me, especially if they are quick. No matter how many times I have told myself that the fear is irrational and unhealthy, I could not overcome this. I have gotten light headed and nearly passed out from seeing them in the hands of pet store attendants in the past.

So on with my exposure therapy, which is the most common way of treating such phobias. Now the key to exposure therapy is to ensure the experience is not negative. So when asking about the small toonie sized one clinging to the back of his cage and getting the response, “That one might not be a good one for handling” made me very anxious.

The pet store “handler”, (I call them that because they are as brave as those that tame lions and tigers) pulled the container down to the floor and off came the lid. There had already grown a crowd around the isle to see all the commotion. At the site of the rose hair tarantula the 6.5 foot mountain of a man beside me let out a shutter and a“whooah!” which probably didn’t impress his girlfriend much, and certainly didn’t impress me.

I backed away, all the mental preparation up this point got flushed down the toilet and I responded saying “I don’t think I can do this” and was ready to move along. Stephanie, in all her support told me she would do it first, and sure enough, she did.

Well, pull out the focus again, and lay down your hand Vince. I asked if it could bite, and she said, “it probably won’t” which really was not a confidence booster. The creature crawled on to my hand, probably wondering why the ground suddenly got so wet and clammy. I could not believe how gentle this animal was. He strolled half way up my arm with a very thin string of silk coming from his abdomen.

And that was that! One of the toughest things I have done wrapped up in a short 30 seconds. I now have a new friend, he has eight legs, eight eyes, soft furry legs, and I have named him.....Newman.

vincekrebs.blogspot.com

May 9

Since May 9, 2009 this day has been a very significant and personal day for our family.  May 9 has always entailed doing something special with the kids.  This year was no different.  It was spent in the valley of the five lakes in Jasper.

On a day like today, I am thankful for so many reasons. Skinny white legs in cold clear lakes, excitement over a captured grasshopper, spending time with my wife and boys.  No matter how busy this week had become, it was just important to shuffle it all aside and take time for what mattered.

Wasteful thinking

I think about waste….alot.  Every item I unpack that is wrapped in 5 layers of plastic, 3 layers of cardboard and multiple pages of warranty and service instructions in three languages is bothering. 

I think recycling, while a very good idea, is morphing into an excuse to be wasteful.  Take for example the 20lbs of flyers that landed on my doorstep the other day.  All of about three of those pages I have any interest in.  Now instead of cancelling the delivery of those flyers years ago, I justified the process by having a blue bin in the household.  Drop the papers in, forget about it.

The purpose of recycling is to reduce waste, not justify more consumption.  If we look at items for more than its exterior, but really have an appreciation for what went into making this product. In a sense empathetic to its creation, for instance, what went into making that steak you are having for supper.  The sun’s energy, the processes involved in the growth of the grass and the nutrients consumed in its growth.  The energy and nutrients consumed while the animal travels and feeds. The time and energy that went into the growth of that animal.  The animals life itself.

It almost makes me want to turn into a vegetarian. At the very least though, it makes me think of the amount in which I consume, to consider that my consumption does not go without a cost not matter what it is.

vincekrebs.blogspot.com